On May 13, 2021, Mary Tucker – wife, mother, grandmother, librarian, docent, avid gardener and more – died peacefully at her home in Freehold, NJ.  She was surrounded by her family at the time.  The cause of death was a stroke.

Mary Isabelle Rickman Tucker was born on October 7, 1935 in Metuchen, NJ.  When she was 2 years old, her family moved to Garwood, NJ.  She remembered fondly time spent on the back porch cutting out paper dolls and playing with her friend Jane with whom she stayed in touch her entire life.  The house seemed very alive with animals and activity.  We have a beautiful photograph of her with her Dad, his new (used) 1936 Chevrolet (which they bought in '39), her brother John with one of his pigeons, and her with a cat under one arm and a pet chicken under the other.   In another photograph, during the WWII, it looked like the entire yard was planted as a victory garden.  The Rickmans were doing their part.

In 1945, Mary moved to Statesir Place in Middletown, NJ.  Her family became active in the Red Bank Methodist Church where she made lots of friends, many of whom she is still in touch with.  They bought a small cottage in Ocean Gate and would drive down Route 9 on the weekends during the summer to spend their days on the beach.  In 1953 she graduated from Leonardo High School.  She went on to business school in Newark.  Afterwards she got a job as a secretary and worked at a Newark law firm which represented Dixon Ticonderoga Pencils in Jersey City.  She moved out to Denver, CO, for a year to work, but eventually moved back to Monmouth County.

In 1958, she married James R. "Dick" Tucker.  They met at the Singles Club at the Red Bank Methodist Church.  He lived with three other engineers on Port-au-Peck Avenue, and they all worked at Fort Monmouth.  The Tuckers, the Kiernans, the Pfaffs, and the Carusos all hung out together and were also lifelong friends.  Recently, one of the Carusos mailed a thumb drive with videos of their life from that time and their respective weddings. Their wedding was small and beautiful.  When they kissed before embarking on their honeymoon to the Poconos, they both seemed to blush. Touch football in the street or on the beach, picnics at the newly opened Allaire State Park, and drives to New York City.

Their first apartment was in Red Bank on the edge of Little Silver.  In 1959, Owen Richard Tucker was born, and they moved to Victoria Place in Middletown just a few houses from Mary's childhood home.  She was near her brother John, his wife Beverly and her nieces Susan and Diane and her nephew Paul.  William David Tucker was born in 1963, and Eric Robert Tucker was born in 1965.  There are many photos of Mary and her family dressed up and ready to go to church.   And of course, Patchy the dog, and Sissy the cat often were included.  (Sissy was the best.)

The moved to Cold Indian Springs Road in Wayside in 1969 (after several years in Middlebrook).  In the 70's, Mary went to school and got a 2-year degree at Brookdale Community College in Library Science.  She intermittently worked at the libraries in the Ocean Township school system.   At home she helped to create a culture of books, and the library was an exciting place to go not only for books but also social activities for her kids.

In the early 1970s, she had a serious health issue which was later diagnosed to be Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma.  She overcame it, but it was a dark time.  Many thought she wouldn't make it.  She has remained in remission for almost 50 years, and is an inspiration to others in her extended family who have struggled with cancer.

In the 70s Dick grew sideburns and Mary grew her hair long and pulled it back with a leather strap and stick.  We got a tent and later a Coleman pop-up camper and travelled around the country.  She inspired a love of the National Park Service, open spaces, wild life, and Canada where her parents were from.  They also bought a piece of property in PA and started a small Christmas tree farm.  The project was eventually set aside and the property sold, but the trees have now grown up into an orderly forest.  I like to think of it as a kind of lasting tribute to both of them.

At home she created a stable environment.  She made lunch for her kids (and husband) every day until at least 1983:  a sandwich cut in half and wrapped in wax paper, 3 cookies in a baggie, and an apple.  When the kids were off to college she said with relief, "I'll never make another bag lunch," and she returned to college.  She studied at Keene State and completed her BA in History.  Her love of history remained with her for the rest of her life.

In the late 1980's, Mary and her husband started another new chapter.  They sold the house in Wayside and built a new one in Cream Ridge, NJ in western Monmouth County.  They centered their life around creating a new home and becoming active the in Allentown Methodist Church including lots of social activities with the Allentown Villagers.  She was also active in the Monmouth County Historical Association at this time, and she became a docent at the Covenhoven House in Freehold, NJ .

In Cream Ridge, they started another small tree farm with over 500 evergreens and some deciduous trees, too.  Visiting them in their house was like going to Longwood Gardens.  Not kidding.  There were 2 flower gardens, 3 compost piles (she was into that), a huge vegetable garden, an asparagus patch, and a grape arbor.  The trees planted were ones they both loved:  a beautiful Linden tree that buzzed with bees every Spring; a Kwanzan cherry tree at the top of the driveway that leaned westward heavy with double blossoms; a Pin Oak that turned golden-orange in the fall held its leaves all winter;  a Purple Leaf Sand cherry which popped red all year; and bluebird boxes to help protect their decreasing numbers.  And there were lilacs everywhere all of which she cultivated from the lilacs that she first planted in Wayside 20 years earlier.  Again, a forest grew up around the house.  Everything was there because they planned it and wanted it.  In the summer she would walk out the vegetable garden talking loudly to scare away whatever that animal was that lived under the shed nearby.  She was very happy there.

After Dick died suddenly in 2001, she continued to keep up the house.  No help cleaning around the house, no help with the yard, and no help individually pruning hundreds of potential Christmas trees.  Her effort is a testament of strength and commitment that inspires.  Picture her at dusk when it was cool, wearing a hat, riding the John Deere mower between rows of trees, stirring up insects and being followed by swallows eating them up.

In 2006, she downsized and moved to Freehold.  The smaller house freed her up to travel with some friends and through various elder hostels continuing to learn about new things.  Her neighbors all commented on how hard she would continue to work in her yard taking care of her roses, peonies, lilac, forsythia and more.  Her back yard butting up along a field so she would continue to see lots of wild life and birds.

The pandemic was very hard on Mary.  It limited her activity and kept her at home inside.  She was careful, and only took reasonable risks.  She really missed her freedoms.  She was glad to be vaccinated and see her family together again.

When you remember her please think of someone who is funny, smart, conversational, and independent who loved animals, her pets, the outdoors, gardening, flowers, history, books, and learning.  She was a woman of conviction with a strong belief in democratic causes and was defender of social justice and equity.

Mary is survived by her three sons in order:  Owen and his wife Chris; Bill and his husband Richard; and Eric and his wife Laura.  She has 5 beautiful grandchildren with whom she was  very close:  Meg, Ben, Emma, Aidan, and Cole.

A funeral service will be held 12:30 Tuesday, May 18 ^th at Peppler Funeral Home, 114 South Main, St. Allentown. Friends may call Monday from 4 to 6 pm and again Tuesday, 11:30 until time of service. Burial will be private in Cream Ridge Cemetery at the convenience of the family.

In lieu of flowers, we think she would appreciate a donation to the Monmouth County SPCA .